Damn, I am so mad and so angry, so depressed and so weak. I can't stop my thoughts today and I have dwelled in the negative light. Sometimes I am relieved for awhile after I display all the turmoil inside me. I hope I get relief from these thoughts. I love my partner Janet Soooo much. I do not want to leave her and I never thought that when we bought our dog, that I might actually die - before her. I can't bear thinking about it all!
I hate this cancer! I was sick during the night and depressed when I woke up. My body feels weak, I had this stomach ache and I feel sorry for myself. Sometimes, when unwanted moods take over, it seems best to let it all out so one day IT IS ALL OUT. Then, there is no repair - the moods just lift - eventually. I think I still stand in a place where I will feel better. BETTER - is still reachable. I need to wait.
Cindy, it's okay to be mad and sad and let all this out. It's what we're here for, to support you. We love you, maybe it is time for some more pampering. I will put a day aside for you if you would like to come and get your nails done. Let me know. I love you.
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